Relic Rant

[ESCC]

What is the upcharge for a relic amp?

[mjo]

I knew a guy who had a tele go through a fire. The body was pretty bad, but he got some help to save it, it worked. He posted pics on a forum and inspired a couple guys to take torches to their guitars ... I'm dead serious -LOL
TBF, these guys had spare guitars laying around to play with.
Once the deed was done, it was pretty cool looking, but I wouldn't throw my tele on the fire to get the look.
I bought a '70s Musicman because it felt great. I call it an ugly stick, just because of the design choices, don't care -LOL
I'm with Hammertone .... and I LOVE that tele, it just looks comfortable !

-Cheers,
Mike

[mjo]

What is the upcharge for a relic amp?

...is it the original cloth ?? .... hahahahahaha

[Phil59]

OK, real. '52. Relic? Non-relic? Red, green, gold, 'burst or blonde? I don't really care, so long as it feels good and sounds good.

I thought it looked too good to be a relic.

[chasranney]

Loudon Wainwright III's "Red Guitar"

[AKA]

Nothing wrong with a little rant. Relic’ing; not for me either. But, there are worse things.

AKA

[Spook410]

Relic..

[yebdox]

I am actually not opposed to anyone buying anything at any price if it inspires them.... I just let my mind wander further down the road. The romance seems to stop at the vague imaginings of hours of authentic sweat, effort and music, which could be inspirational to some. No argument there. I just veer a bit to the left when imagining the hygiene and playing habits of the previous fictional owner.

If I were in the relic'ing business, I would conjure up a faux and very colorful history of each and every guitar that would be unverifiable, but outrageous: ("This blackguard beauty was once involved in a prison escape when it's 2nd owner, Lefty Harshbarger, doing 70 years as an accomplice to a multiple homicide in Chicago, wedged it between the main transfer slide at the loading dock for the Cook County Jail kitchen just before evening cleanup and bed check, and then slipped out, enjoying 3 hours of freedom before being apprehended by local police at a record store on the South Side. He then lost the guitar as a result of a bet that he could remain free for 24 hours before being apprehended. It's new owner, Skippy Manson, was eventually released on good behaviour and wound up as a session player in Nashville, enjoying a short, but successful career touring with Amy Bundersnatch, who later became famous as one Miss Dolly Parton. His career came to an end when the aforementioned Telecaster, substituting for a proper car jack, broke off at the headstock, depositing the rear end of a '62 VW bug on Skippy's forehead, which, while not ending his life, did leave him bereft of any musical ability, and he subsequently sold it after obtaining his degree in library science. It was next owned by....")

[Bluedawg]

These guys in Italy they make relic guitars from wine barrels.

Paoletti Guitars | Italian Handmade Guitars

I like the looks of relics overall, but some of them just don't look right.

[Litterick]

It is possible to buy guitars secondhand, authentically damaged by previous owners, at a fraction of the price of a relic.

[Greywolf]

If they get dinged , it's part of the journey , but to willingly do it , as a luthier is an abomination . I feel the same way about pre ripped jeans .. EARN it !

For all the wanna be's who can't earn their stripes ... enjoy your dillusion

[Average Joe]

A very minimum of relicing, in order to take the new sheen off a guitar and especially make a nitro finished neck feel worn in, can be nice. I think I read somewhere that one of the earliest requests for relicing came from Keith Richards, who wanted the neck to feel worn.
The problem for me is that to many relics are way overdone. Unless a guitar's been used to showel snow in Minnesota winters for 30 years, they don't look like that.

Generally, I'm sufficiently clumsy to do my own relic jobs, given a bit of time

[lawson-stone]

Mine, too! And as an added bonus, I’d rather listen to the crazy sounds she makes in heat than anyone who‘d pay for anything relic’d.

Are you really suggesting anyone who buys a "relic'd" guitar can't play?

I don't know why anybody even cares about what someone else chooses to buy.

[AllanAllen]

Are you really suggesting anyone who buys a "relic'd" guitar can't play?

I don't know why anybody even cares about what someone else chooses to buy.

Based on the overall bitterness of this thread, I'd say it's jealousy.

[DawgBone]

I don't know why anybody even cares about what someone else chooses to buy.

Do as I do or be ostracized is the norm in today's world. Your guitar or motorcycle or other decisions should be the same as mine or up yours you are wrong and evil seems to be the average internet mindset. You can't be a man cause you don't smoke the same cigarettes as me. Your instruments and attire must meet jazz and blues police standards.

I like relics. I even like bad relics. If it plays and sounds good the shiny finish doesn't matter. Some of the best playing guitars sometimes have my least favorite paint job. What do you do in that situation? Pick the one that sounds and plays the best. How many guys are divorced because they picked the best looking one instead of the one that plays and sounds good? Exterior refinements fade, interior ones get better over time. There's your guitar answer.

[Greywolf]

I do knock the nitro glaze of the neck with 3000 grit wet , not to relic , but to make it less sticky in the Hot Humid southern summers.

[lammie200]

I am actually not opposed to anyone buying anything at any price if it inspires them.... I just let my mind wander further down the road. The romance seems to stop at the vague imaginings of hours of authentic sweat, effort and music, which could be inspirational to some. No argument there. I just veer a bit to the left when imagining the hygiene and playing habits of the previous fictional owner.

If I were in the relic'ing business, I would conjure up a faux and very colorful history of each and every guitar that would be unverifiable, but outrageous: ("This blackguard beauty was once involved in a prison escape when it's 2nd owner, Lefty Harshbarger, doing 70 years as an accomplice to a multiple homicide in Chicago, wedged it between the main transfer slide at the loading dock for the Cook County Jail kitchen just before evening cleanup and bed check, and then slipped out, enjoying 3 hours of freedom before being apprehended by local police at a record store on the South Side. He then lost the guitar as a result of a bet that he could remain free for 24 hours before being apprehended. It's new owner, Skippy Manson, was eventually released on good behaviour and wound up as a session player in Nashville, enjoying a short, but successful career touring with Amy Bundersnatch, who later became famous as one Miss Dolly Parton. His career came to an end when the aforementioned Telecaster, substituting for a proper car jack, broke off at the headstock, depositing the rear end of a '62 VW bug on Skippy's forehead, which, while not ending his life, did leave him bereft of any musical ability, and he subsequently sold it after obtaining his degree in library science. It was next owned by....")

"Indiana Wants Me"

[Spook410]

[QUOTE=yebdox;1318404]... a faux and very colorful history of each and every guitar that would be unverifiable, but outrageous: ("This blackguard beauty was once involved in a prison escape when it's 2nd owner, Lefty Harshbarger..QUOTE]


OK yebdox.. pretty cool and creative.

[wintermoon]

I am actually not opposed to anyone buying anything at any price if it inspires them.... I just let my mind wander further down the road. The romance seems to stop at the vague imaginings of hours of authentic sweat, effort and music, which could be inspirational to some. No argument there. I just veer a bit to the left when imagining the hygiene and playing habits of the previous fictional owner.

If I were in the relic'ing business, I would conjure up a faux and very colorful history of each and every guitar that would be unverifiable, but outrageous: ("This blackguard beauty was once involved in a prison escape when it's 2nd owner, Lefty Harshbarger, doing 70 years as an accomplice to a multiple homicide in Chicago, wedged it between the main transfer slide at the loading dock for the Cook County Jail kitchen just before evening cleanup and bed check, and then slipped out, enjoying 3 hours of freedom before being apprehended by local police at a record store on the South Side. He then lost the guitar as a result of a bet that he could remain free for 24 hours before being apprehended. It's new owner, Skippy Manson, was eventually released on good behaviour and wound up as a session player in Nashville, enjoying a short, but successful career touring with Amy Bundersnatch, who later became famous as one Miss Dolly Parton. His career came to an end when the aforementioned Telecaster, substituting for a proper car jack, broke off at the headstock, depositing the rear end of a '62 VW bug on Skippy's forehead, which, while not ending his life, did leave him bereft of any musical ability, and he subsequently sold it after obtaining his degree in library science. It was next owned by....")

Amy Bundersnatch?

[Jabberwocky]

Amy Bundersnatch?

Got me real good. I actually Googled Amy Bundersnatch. I got Benedict Cumberbatch.

[J.C.]

Got me real good. I actually Googled Amy Bundersnatch. I got Benedict Cumberbatch.

Got me too! I told my wife Dolly's real name, she Googled it & said I was an idiot. I told her it was the jazz guys, not me.

[Jabberwocky]

Got me too! I told my wife Dolly's real name, she Googled it & said I was an idiot. I told her it was the jazz guys, not me.

And no, you're not that Jay Cee because that Jay Cee ain't got no wife.

Hah! Hah! Blame it on the jazz guys, sure. That makes the two of us, not the sharpest knives in the drawer.

[Dennis D]

I am actually not opposed to anyone buying anything at any price if it inspires them.... I just let my mind wander further down the road. The romance seems to stop at the vague imaginings of hours of authentic sweat, effort and music, which could be inspirational to some. No argument there. I just veer a bit to the left when imagining the hygiene and playing habits of the previous fictional owner.

If I were in the relic'ing business, I would conjure up a faux and very colorful history of each and every guitar that would be unverifiable, but outrageous: ("This blackguard beauty was once involved in a prison escape when it's 2nd owner, Lefty Harshbarger, doing 70 years as an accomplice to a multiple homicide in Chicago, wedged it between the main transfer slide at the loading dock for the Cook County Jail kitchen just before evening cleanup and bed check, and then slipped out, enjoying 3 hours of freedom before being apprehended by local police at a record store on the South Side. He then lost the guitar as a result of a bet that he could remain free for 24 hours before being apprehended. It's new owner, Skippy Manson, was eventually released on good behaviour and wound up as a session player in Nashville, enjoying a short, but successful career touring with Amy Bundersnatch, who later became famous as one Miss Dolly Parton. His career came to an end when the aforementioned Telecaster, substituting for a proper car jack, broke off at the headstock, depositing the rear end of a '62 VW bug on Skippy's forehead, which, while not ending his life, did leave him bereft of any musical ability, and he subsequently sold it after obtaining his degree in library science. It was next owned by....")

Now that is some serious, articulate, credible, thoroughly plausible provenance. I do believe there's an auction house or two or three that would pay handsomely to avail themselves of your services.
Now - - how are you with embellishing the usual suspects? You know, the questionable Carroll Shelby original Shelby Cobras, or those dubious pre-war Martins with replaced tops, or those Gibson Johnny Smiths used in the Moonlight in Vermont studios ?
And there's always that Black Forest-stored / stolen Mercedes Benz GullWing that raced etc etc etc.... Van Gogh's cleaning lady, a Shakespeare First Folio, etc ....

" You had me at the Cook County Jail kitchen ! "

: )

[alltunes]

Do I prefer this over a brand new sparkly guitar?............YES!

[yebdox]

Now that is some serious, articulate, credible, thoroughly plausible provenance. I do believe there's an auction house or two or three that would pay handsomely to avail themselves of your services.
Now - - how are you with embellishing the usual suspects? You know, the questionable Carroll Shelby original Shelby Cobras, or those dubious pre-war Martins with replaced tops, or those Gibson Johnny Smiths used in the Moonlight in Vermont studios ?
And there's always that Black Forest-stored / stolen Mercedes Benz GullWing that raced etc etc etc.... Van Gogh's cleaning lady, a Shakespeare First Folio, etc ....

" You had me at the Cook County Jail kitchen ! "

: )

If I only had more time!

As I said, my mind veers sideways a bit, not meant to suggest any purchasing behavior for anyone or to deride people's interests, but this post has certainly evoked a wide range of responses. Yours is the correct one. All in fun, and apologies to any wives who have lower opinions of their husbands as a result.

Amy Bundersnatch felt good on the tongue, so I went with it.