The Jazz Guitar Chord Dictionary
  1. #1

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    Alex, the organ player and I love our drummer Martin. But we have one problem with him – he often responds belated or even not at all to messages. Lately he even didn't respond to suggestions of possible gigs. We kind of wonder some times if he still loves us and if he's still in the band.
    So a couple of weeks ago I called Raphael, a drummer that I wanted to play with forever and we set up a date. Yesterday we met and played. And it was so much fun. He didn't just played great but also brought in new impulses like "let's try an afro beat on that one".
    I'm afraid we are in love. But like in an actual affair with the joy we also have remorse. What are we gonna tell Martin? Do we tell him at all? When do we have to tell him? We are confused. But it was so much fun.

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  3. #2

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    My best guess would be from the moment you have the actual "go" from the new drummer that he's committed to playing with you guys.
    From what i've read so far, it seems that your current drummer isn't all that interested in playing with you guys. I'd be straight up in the conversation, saying what's what and how you came to the current situation. (going further with a different drummer).
    Is this easy? I don't think so, but change can be a good thing too.

    Good luck.

  4. #3

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    What are we gonna tell Martin? Do we tell him at all? When do we have to tell him? We are confused. But it was so much fun
    Just send him a playlist with the songs End of a Love Affair (some instrumental version, like Wes in the Organ trio, the title fits better than the lyrics) and Just Friends.
    He'll understand.

  5. #4

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    Call the old drummer, not text and ask if he's getting the texts because he's not replying. This could be a technology issue. If it's not a technology issue, the guy doesn't want to be in the band but he doesn't know how to tell you or doesn't want to upset anyone. So you will have to kick him out of a group he doesn't even want to be in. Good luck.

  6. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by orri
    He'll understand.
    Maybe not - he’s only a drummer

    But seriously, AA’s making a very important point. Our vocalist developed a minor medical issue and had to cancel our practice session Saturday morning. She emailed the band, but she had a typo in my email address and I never got the message. And that typo became her default address for me in her contact list. If the bass player hadn’t called me as I was putting on my coat to leave for the club, I would have wasted the morning driving to an empty, locked club. So your drummer deserves one frank discussion and a shot at redemption. If he used to have the spark, it may just be obscured by personal issues that can be resolved.

    Band dynamics are tough. I’m lucky enough to have been playing with the same half dozen people for 15 to 40+ years, and the immediate family has remained free of dysfunction. We’ve had to disown at least a dozen over the years who didn’t get the concept that the music and the band matter more than any player. Good luck!