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  1. #1

    Simple Tune in Progress: Rome at Night

    Harsh criticism is fine. I’m looking to improve my writing, playing, and sound. I composed and recorded this on Sunday.



    In the A part, the changes are Cmaj7, Bmin7 with the root on the 6 and the 2 and 3 strings sharpened (I forgot the name of this chord), Em7, A7

    B part: C, F#7, Bm, E7

    Cheers

  2. #2
    I don’t think you’re ready to compose. You might get more responses by posting a track playing a standard.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by KirkP View Post
    I don’t think you’re ready to compose. You might get more responses by posting a track playing a standard.
    Curiously, is anyone ever "ready" to compose? I think the process of becoming "ready" involves composing, no?

    Anyway, for what it's worth, I think you have some decent melodic instincts given the simple nature of the tune. Nice repetition, development of the main motif, etc.

    I think the melody in general could be stronger with some phrasing fixes that would make it feel less "stiff", and there's quite a few questionable note choices (to me) that sound a little too clashy to feel intentional.

    Are you aiming this tune at the jazz crowd, or just composing a nice background theme? It's probably a little repetitive in the harmony/melody to keep my interest as a listener if I'm expecting "jazz", but it's easy enough to listen to that it's perfectly fine as a backdrop (minus the aforementioned 'clams' and phrasing issues I perceive).

    On the plus, there were a couple chord changes in the last section of the tune that surprised me and generated interest that I liked.

    Not a bad first/second/third/"wherever you're at" outing into composition! Listen to the kind of music you want to write, a lot. Don't be afraid to edit, start over, etc. At the least, it's a good sign that I can sing back/imagine your melody in my mind, which is more than I can say for a lot of music.

  4. #4
    Thanks for the detailed feedback, MarketTomato. I listened again after reading your comment and agree with everything except that I couldn’t hear the clash of some of the notes.

    This is my first jazzy composition although I composed a lot of ambient/background music years ago, which no doubt led to your observation about this piece being background music. I tend to like repetition in music a la Philip Glass or Bohren der Club of Gore but don’t want to bore my listener. I’m sure I’ll get better at keeping interest if I compose more.

  5. #5
    Slather that in some reverb and I think you have a solid surf track, but maybe not really jazz.
    Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny. FZ

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