Tune in progress: "Release"

strumcat · #1 01-07-2012, 02:20 AM

This is just a very simple sketch of something I'm working on called "Release".

http://soundcloud.com/strumcat/release-mp3

The sound itself (not the music) is synthesized (I apologize for this) and sounds very simple and muzak-ish. This is the only way I know to get a rough approximation of an arrangement while working alone. But at least every note is original and entered by hand, i.e. no drum machines or automatic backing tracks were used.

If you can bear to listen "around" the sound, I would appreciate any frank evaluation of the chords and melody. How do you think it would sound if played by live musicians? Do you think it would work as a framework for improvisation? Is it too simple for jazz? Is there anything you dislike or like about it? All constructive criticism is welcome.

Also, anyone feel like collaborating by taking a stab at writing lyrics for it?

FatJeff · #2 01-07-2012, 11:43 AM

I do like it...although it's a bit tough to really hear it with that synth rendition. Do you have Band in t a Box? if not, you can shoot me the chords, I'll put it into BiAB and it might be closer to a jazz rendition.

One other comment - the rhythms of the melody are pretty rigid; are you really going for the straight feel here, or are you thinking it might swing?

Maybe the best thing to do would be to get a suitable backing track and then you could play your guitar over top of it...that would let the natural expression you're thinking of come out.

AmundLauritzen · #3 01-07-2012, 12:16 PM

Nice use of modal interchange to get phrygian.
Structure wise, it's going in many directions. Now if that's what you're going for then that's fine, but it's good to be aware of it anyway. Maybe experiment with modulations or more adventurous harmonic transitions if you feel it would add to the tune.
You can experiment with extending or altering the chords more, maybe expanding the progression using more secondary dominants to achieve more movement. You can make a chord into a dominant whenever the next chord is up a perfect fourth. Identify these areas and try messing around with it. Though if you do that, you might change the melody if the chord is a minor chord and the melody note is a minor third, or if the melody note is a major seventh.

Nice work.
Sounds like you're working with MIDI. You can import it into Cubase or a similar program and assign VST instruments to the different tracks. It will make it sound more alive.

I always enjoy hearing original compositions. Would love to hear more of your work.

strumcat · #4 01-07-2012, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FatJeff

I do like it...although it's a bit tough to really hear it with that synth rendition. Do you have Band in t a Box? if not, you can shoot me the chords, I'll put it into BiAB and it might be closer to a jazz rendition.

One other comment - the rhythms of the melody are pretty rigid; are you really going for the straight feel here, or are you thinking it might swing?

Maybe the best thing to do would be to get a suitable backing track and then you could play your guitar over top of it...that would let the natural expression you're thinking of come out.

Hi, Jeff. I don't have BIAB (I'm using PC/Windows). The chords (following) are simple. Feel free to jazz them up as you like. Each chord is preceded by the number of beats to play it:

Intro: 4D, 4Em, 4C, 4F with the G dropped to A,
First 8 bars: 3C, 1D, 4Eb, 4G, 4Bm, 4Am, 4F, 8D,
Main 8 bars: 4G, 2Bm, 2F, 4C, 4F, 4G, 2Bm, 2F, 4Am, 2F, 2D

Yes, I agree that the melody and the whole thing in general are simple, rigid and plodding at this point. That comes from mousing the whole thing into a piano-roll, since I don't play keys. As with any song in progress, the tempo and rhythm are open to modification.

Thanks for your help.

strumcat · #5 01-07-2012, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmundLauritzen

Nice use of modal interchange to get phrygian.
Structure wise, it's going in many directions. Now if that's what you're going for then that's fine, but it's good to be aware of it anyway. Maybe experiment with modulations or more adventurous harmonic transitions if you feel it would add to the tune.
You can experiment with extending or altering the chords more, maybe expanding the progression using more secondary dominants to achieve more movement. You can make a chord into a dominant whenever the next chord is up a perfect fourth. Identify these areas and try messing around with it. Though if you do that, you might change the melody if the chord is a minor chord and the melody note is a minor third, or if the melody note is a major seventh.

Nice work.
Sounds like you're working with MIDI. You can import it into Cubase or a similar program and assign VST instruments to the different tracks. It will make it sound more alive.

I always enjoy hearing original compositions. Would love to hear more of your work.

Thanks for the nice comments, AmundLauritzen. Lots of good ideas there to try. It does need to be fleshed out, extended, and livened up. I know very little about theory so didn't understand all you said, but I get the gist of it. And, yes, the structure is almost nonexistant at this point, just three parts more or less thrown together. It needs a lot of work, for sure.

Yes, MIDI, a necessary evil at this point.

But I hope the end result will be something a live band could play, The synth instruments I used are not very good quality (Windows GM standard) and can undoubtedly be improved with VST replacements.

I have lots of little bits and pieces cooking, in various states of disarray. I will try to upload some of it to SoundCloud, since I don't want to clutter up the forum here with more than one thing at a time.

I appreciate your help.

AmundLauritzen · #6 01-07-2012, 04:22 PM

Can you post the chord changes? I can take a look at them and give you some suggestions to things you can try.

strumcat · #7 01-07-2012, 11:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AmundLauritzen

Can you post the chord changes? I can take a look at them and give you some suggestions to things you can try.

Here are the chords. As you can see, they're all vanilla major and minor chords, and could use a little spice. It's in G, though that may not be immediately apparent from the first 12 bars.

(intro) |D . . . |Em . . . |C . . . |F . . . |

(second part) |C . . D |Eb . . . |G . . . |Bm . . . |Am . . . |F . . . |D . . . |D . . . |

(main part) |G . . . |Bm . F . |C . . . |F . . . |G . . . |Bm . F . |Am . . . |F . D . |

(and back to second part)

Immense thanks for any assistance.