tune in progress: neww bossa Just Maybe

[wizard3739]

This song is a bossanova and is in preparation for a possible CDBaby release sometime soon. I wrote the music and Colleen (my wife) wrote the lyrics. We just received the copyright and thought we could post it here for comment. This is the first song we have written together and as you can probably guess, also the first time recorded in a real studio. It is quite a learning process for our band "Starlight" and a long way from being a finished product. Our goal is to put together a song that might be appropriate for a CD Baby release. Please listen, all comments will be sincerely appreciated.

http://www.box.com/s/oa4iy4xrjf7hl1ftkbec

wiz

[fep]

Hey Howard,

(Where's the lead sheet? I think you'll get better reviews if you include a lead sheet)

Congrats to you and Colleen on writing this tune. I bet it was a lot of work but rewarding.

Hang on, I'll be back, I'm on my wife's laptop (oops, ha ha, I didn't mean it that way) - her laptop computer I mean.

I'm going to listen on my pc where I have those studio monitor speakers.

I'm back...

I'm digging Colleen's vocals

I like the vocal backup to your guitar solo, cool idea, nice guitar solo.

The arrangement, is it too late to make changes? I think the electric piano and bass are too locked together, i.e to often they're playing the same rhythmic pattern. I'd change the general rhythmic figure for the piano to separate it's pattern from the bass, to something like:



That's just one option, but I think you know what I'm thinking. This will give it more of a bossa feel in my opinion.

You said the mix was a draft so I suppose it probably has changed. But, FWIW here's my 2 cents

The mix... I'd change the panning. I don't like the bass and piano being so far left and the guitar so far right. I'm thinking the bass dead center. The vocals sound good, dead center with a wide stereo reverb, I think the vocals are already this way. Piano at about 9:30 o'clock, guitar at about 2:30.

The drums sound too centered to me. If you used a lot of mics i'd place the kit across the stereo field, i.e. something like low tom at 8:00 o clock, mid tom 11 high tom 1, snare 1 kick 12 high hat 2, right overhead 2, left overhead 10. I have a hard time hearing the kick drum, perhaps a bit more volume on that.

Overall, a nice tune, I think your fans are going to like it.

[augusjazz]

Very good song.
Your wife is very beautiful voice and sings very well.
Congratulations and good luck with the CD.

[patskywriter]

the pianist is definitely taking charge re: chord changes and rhythms. the guitar would sound better an octave higher and with more of a steady rhythm à la oscar castro-neves or durval ferreira. i'm sure the clashing chords will be worked out in time.